I get a lot of spam/scam email, so I though I’d talk about some of them, we’ll crack things off with this email from Melvin spencer who clearly hasn’t looked at this site and oddly spells their surname with a little s… each to their own.

Hope you are doing well.

A pleasant enough start, lets continue…

My name is Melvin spencer and I am the Digital marketing expert of a leading software provider company. As per my analysis, your website is not performing well in the Google, Yahoo and Bing organic searches. Your traffic flow is poor from last couple of months due to some of the reasons. You might know about recent Google Panda 4.2, Penguin, Pigeon, and Pay date etc. update.

Oh Melvin, had you actually analysed my site, you might have guessed that I really could not give a shit, it’s just a playground where I test things and post crap like this.

Some of the aspects given below:

·  Due to poor and unauthorized link sites.

Such as?

·  Relevant keyword phrases are not visible on first page listing.

what keyword

·  Due to HTML validation errors and warnings present in website.
·  Your website is not search engine friendly.

You’re right, it doesn’t validate, but then neither does bbc.co.uk, wikipedia.org or stackoverflow.com, all of which rank highly, so clearly validation isn’t the be-all and end-all you say it is.

·  Website content quality is not high standard.

OK… I’ll give you that one.

·  Website is having on-page and on-site issues.

* checks console *

nope

Area of Improvement:

·  We will give you 1st page ranking on Google, Yahoo, and Bing.

·  Improve your organic traffic and sales.

·  Target your local market to increase business.

But I dont sell anything, you would know that if you weren’t a bot.

We offer website analysis report will be handled by our Team to take your website to a greater plot and make your business more beneficial.

A greater plot?

Let me know if you are interested and we will send our monthly plan and price quote.  

I think I’ll pass, sending this from a Gmail account really doesn’t give you any credibility.

Thanks&Regards,

Melvin spencer 

 (Web Analyst)

You’re welcome.

Disclaimer:- “Note: – We are not spammer. We found your email through manually efforts.We are sorry if you get email 2 or 3 times.You can simply reply with “remove” so we will delete your email from our list.Thanks again.”The CAN-SPAM Act of 2003”

Yes you are, you’re a spammer, by every sense of the word. Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam,

Photo by Hannes Johnson on Unsplash